Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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