i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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