summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
