I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize