Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
