Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
