i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
