Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize