either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
