I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize