whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize