It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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