Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Randomize
