Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Randomize
