Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
