i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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