im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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