dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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