Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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