its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Randomize
