Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
