ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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