I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Randomize
