Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
