And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
