He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Randomize
