So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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