Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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