Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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