apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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