Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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