I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
