im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I believe in your delicious
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize