it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize