she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
