We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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