so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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