Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
