Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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