I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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