My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
