i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
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