ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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