Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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