I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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