Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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