Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
