somebody snuck up and got me drunk
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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