SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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