let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
