Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
