i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I didn't notice because vodka
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
